The Law of Murphy Strikes Again!

The Law of Murphy Strikes Again!

© Allen Merritt (2016)

I woke up Monday morning feeling rested enough, but without being able to put a finger on it I felt kind of like I was walking through limbo land. I should have known right then and there I was in for a ride. Murphy’s Law grabbed on with a vengeance. You know, whatever can go wrong will go wrong? This wasn’t the first time and it may not be the last time. I’ve even written about it in a previous blog. 

Anyway, I just want to know who this Murphy is anyway and where can I find him, so I can give him a little piece of my mind and the what for! That Murphy’s Law mindset is simply negative. There’s no two ways about it. Unfortunately, there is some truth in it from time to time. For me, it began on Monday and interestingly carried on into to Tuesday.

In the best of situations things are not always going to happen the way you think they will or in the time frame you hope they will. Things come about, get in the way, and stop working for no reason whatsoever and so on.  That was my Monday at almost every turn. It was a miracle I got anything done! Put other people’s attitudes, misunderstandings and perspectives into that mix and that barrage of Murphy issues becomes exacerbated. It’s exhausting and sometimes emotional.

Of course, my main concern is how to get through it unscathed and preserve positivity. Some important things to remember is to maintain awareness, breathe, remain calm, do not act rashly, avoid reactivity and give a little space and time to the matter, if you can. I realize this is not always possible up front, especially if there are other people directly involved and time is of the essence.

I have a couple of friends who are always telling me Mercury is in retrograde. I guess it is dwelling there, because it has not left retrograde in quite a long time (he says with an attempt at humor).

Whatever the circumstance, I understand decisions and life happens in these moments where the very core of our humanity and humanness are challenged beyond belief. The good news is that I did get through Monday and made all my appointments and fixed the issues, but I did not walk away feeling great about any of it. And, thus we say time heals all wounds. Take a little time to embrace, accept, adjust or be aware of what you are feeling and what is going on, because then a better decision and responce can come about and healing the situation will be facilitated.

Tuesday led to more frustration between personalities over what happened on Monday all the way to the point where I was prepared to make a decision to walk away and move away from certain job 

opportunities, if need be. I did my best to smooth out problems and successfully for the most part. And, I was grateful. Ultimately, we have to be aware that we cannot always control others and their reactions in the heat of a moment.

I am reminded how I am not the type to want to cause grief for others, but at the same time I wish the same peaceful approach to myself. That is a positive and important message. Be good to yourself so you can be as good if not better to others. Ultimately, the craziness settled, moments passed and along came an apology that really spurred on an opportunity to forgive and forget.  Yahoo!

At the moment, I am looking for only good news to come into the fray from today on. I’m seeing it! I envision it! I command it! Okay, I’ll settle down a bit, but you get the idea. Keep an eye on the prize and look for the best in every situation, especially those that appear to be getting out of hand.

Now, here is another button to my experiences which may prove helpful. I attended a small reception at the end of my conference day Monday and had a little glass of vino! One of the attendees and speakers came along to chit chat. She was lively and fun and shared how her trip was quite the ordeal as a passenger had passed away in mid flight. She relayed how medics, doctors and flight attendants were all busy administering CPR, which they are required to do until paramedics arrive. In this case, the plane had to land to make that happen. Get the picture; a lot of ongoing work for those responders while the family of the passenger looked on in grief. The plane routed to the closest airport and nose dived to the ground faster than the lady had ever experienced in the way of a landing.

After hearing this story, I remember thinking to myself how this makes my crazy day with Murphy and his dad-gummed law seem like nothing at all. So the moral to all this is maybe it isn’t (or wasn’t) all so bad.  And, we are not alone and not the only ones experiencing the causes and effects of one thing or another.

Thus we end another week on a positive note.

Have a good week.

Cheers!

The Chill Pill!

The Chill Pill!

© Allen Merritt (2016)

I worked on a conference this week where I heard a speaker refer to the idea of how if there were such a thing as an exercise pill, everyone would be taking it because it would be so easy to stay fit. It got me to thinking about how pills of any kind have become a natural part of human existence. There is a pill for just about everything now. Everyone gravitates toward the “pill.” Industry loves it. 

The pill can be a profitable and lucrative business for those selling it, but do we really need them to eliminate or alleviate adversity in our lives? 

• Got a headache? Solution = aspirin
• Got back pain? Take a pill targeting pack pain.
• Sneezing? Running nose? Can’t sleep? Yes, there are pills for all of these.
• Erectile dysfunction? There’s a variety of options. Competition abounds.
• Depressed? Psychiatrists have an answer. It’s called a prescription.

Pills have become the answer for how to get rid of or stop something you don’t want to have or deal with. They even help avoid and allow. For example, birth control pills alleviate the chance of pregnancy; PReP pills claim to help ward off HIV; and, even laxatives help make people regular because they do not want to be holding on to something!

In pondering the subject of pills, the topic of side effects now comes into play. Ever hear the announcer for those drug commercials spew off a sped up list of side effects at the end of the announcement? The list is almost as long as the benefits of taking the drug. The negative consequences may outweigh the positive ones. Personally, I am not sure it is worth it in the end.

For me, I have always avoided the idea of taking any kind of drug if I could help it. I attribute that to my mother who was addicted to opiates. After watching all her ups and downs associated with illness, recovery and well-being, I guess I learned by osmosis not to want to take anything in the form of a pill or other mind altering substances. That’s not to say I have not and will not on occasion reach for some relief in a worst case scenario. After all, there are many cases where a particular medication is valuable to its patient and/or cannot (or should not) be avoided; only a qualified physician should recommend such remedies. But when is reaching for a pill the only option?

Remember cute little statements such as, “Take a chill pill, man!” or “Don’t be a bitter pill.”? These kinds of verbal pills were simple statements and reminders that we have the power to change our reality; to relax or modify our attitude toward the better. No side effects, really. Healthier options!

Here are some ideas to remember to avoid negative side effects and negative experiences. Cut down on all the pills. Take a figurative pill instead such as fresh air, exercise, better diet, a few laughs and surround yourself with good friends and family. How about a hot bubble bath?

During the last year and a half of writing positivity blogs I have provided examples, exercises and challenges to help stimulate the positive for everyone. The grab bag grows and is like a bottomless bag of possibilities. I think the key is keeping your eyes and ears open with a keen sense of awareness on what opportunities and best practices work for you.  When you least expect it a sign, a phrase, a song or something comes along to remind you and help you push through the day. No need to run to the medicine chest or for grabbing a pill bottle!

If anything, take a figurative happy pill and do something good for yourself. Take a positive stance and have a better day. And, on that note, here's my suggestion: do something nice for yourself and call me in the morning!

Enjoy your week!

Cheers!

Losing it!

Losing it!

© Allen Merritt (2016)

I lost it.

No doubt about it.

I simply lost it!

I wasn’t even trying to lose it, but I did.

That’s what happened.

I lost it.

I felt all of the old cliches come flooding into my life all at the same time. Needless-to-say, some are the very same comments my mother used to use on me as a child.

• You can’t even keep your head on straight.
• If it were a snake, it would have bitten you.
•  It’s probably right under your nose or on top of your head.
• If your head weren’t attached, you’d lose that, too!

Okay, here’s what happened. After a full day of working hard to catch up on one of my projects I had fallen behind on, I hit another wall because I couldn’t find a disk (or the information stored on the disk).

More specifically, an SD card, which held hours of video footage and represented hundreds of miles travel. Ouch!

My heart sank a bit and my body deflated as I searched everywhere, racking my brain, backtracking, reviewing all the material I had at my fingertips and tearing through a number of bags I had been using over the last few weeks. I literally, poured out a lot of junk from several bags and they were strewn all over the place. Get the picture? Ever been in this situation? You’re trying hard to make things go smoothly and then you find a monkey wrench, a hitch in your get along, a wall, a hurdle, an obstacle/challenge or whatever else you want to call it. No matter how you look at it you are face to face with a negative when you want to be chatting it up with a positive.

The result of losing it meant the possibility of having to re-shoot necessary material needed for the current project. I knew if worse came to worse I could do that and manage for the here and now, but what about other valuable irreplaceable material I captured somewhere out there in the world hundreds of miles away? I would never get that back. It felt like losing all your sentimental items in a house fire. You can’t get it back and you can’t take it with you. Yikes.

This put me into a temporary land of the lost moment, not quite “in a funk”, but wondering what to do to turn my situation around. Of course, I have to share the story, because it is a lesson in living life on a positive note.

Ultimately, as I am sure many others have experienced, I was not sure how to recover from this one. I was aware of my demeanor. I maintained a state of calm. I didn’t fly off the hand or throw a hissy fit. I simply considered my options.

Stop. Rest. Breathe. Contemplate. Pray. Prepare. Embrace the opportunity and hope the new material will be better than the old. I thought about how this was an opportunity to adapt and adjust, to let go in order to shine a light on the circumstances and on the positive possibilities.

Interestingly, as I wrote this blog I was reading a passage in a book I was in the middle of, which seemed to speak to me and appropriate to share. It read, “When we see things in a limited way, we leave ourselves vulnerable to nothing but hassle, pain and confusion.”¹

With this in mind, although I hadn’t found the lost item, I’m resolved not to get upset or beat myself up over it. Like I said, maybe some of the material will come out better in the long run. Stranger things have happened.

In any case, this is the situation I dare say many experience. And, it isn’t the same thing as saying, “The dog ate my homework.” Let’s face, sometimes we just lose it!

Our car keys

Our identification card

Twenty bucks

There is another interesting dichotomy to consider here in terms of “losing it.” This is the idea of losing it in the literal sense such as losing our temper or our mind. Generally, I can’t point to anything good that can come from that sort of losing it. Someone always gets hurt and winds up with the short end of a stick. That’s why I feel it’s s important to take our situations, put them in proper perspective and maintain a sense of balance/peace despite it all.

Sure! On some level I am saddened and wish I wasn’t in this predicament, but I do have a choice to keep my chin up and pull up my boot straps. Create and recreate. I have that power available to me, we all do. Adapt and adjust as needed. I guess I just talked myself into not wasting another minute worrying about it. Now, isn’t that a positive take on life? If my SD card shows up, great. If not, moving on. Life goes on. Just got to do it! Where there is a will there is away, right? 

I know! 

More clichés.

But consider this; any other attitude would lead to quitting or dropping out just as you are getting to the finish line. So why not go for it? Try not to lose it but if you do, remember you have power to keep recovering and keep on going.

By the way, the happy ending is I found it. I never really lost it. I just couldn’t find it right away. It was there all along. Mystery solved, but what a journey. Moments of doubt, hesitation and uncertainty.

If you find yourself losing it this week, take a step back and wait a while, then come back to it later and you might find it, whatever “it” might be. If not, adapt and adjust.

More power to ya!

Cheers!

Don't Think, Just Go!

 Don't Think, Just Go!
©Allen Merritt (2016)

My friend Hilda in Duncan, Oklahoma told me that I should write about my experiences last week. If for any other reason than to show what it's like to go with the flow and shine positivity on circumstances by trusting and believing in the best outcome. After thinking about it, I decided, "Why not!" After all, keeping a positive state of mind is the best approach. So here goes nothing!

I decided to hop on a bus and save myself from the challenge of driving and a few bucks on gas to go into to Los Angeles to work with my coach and take a meeting with a potential project. When it works out schedule wise I appreciate someone else doing all the driving. Off I went!

The thing with bus schedules is you have to go with what schedules they offer and not necessarily what is best for you. That meant a bit of waiting time here and there. I arrived in L.A., took a metro train to Culver City, walked over to a coffee shop and caught up on paperwork and attended a conference call before heading over to bus stop to see my coach. So far, so good.

Afterwards, I made my project meeting. Still good. Suddenly in the middle of my meeting I get a text booking me on a job, which caught me off guard at such a late hour of the day. This sometimes happens, but I really wasn't prepared for it this day. Following the meeting I found myself scrambling to work out details on where I would stay the night and what kind of clothing options I had available and needed for the next day since I had not packed anything.Next I had to figure out transportation options all over the place to a hotel and then to the job site. After all, I didn't have any wheels. I was on foot. Are you getting the picture thus far? Under any circumstances, this would be a bit stressful. On top of everything, my phone was running out of juice making it difficult to research options.

I trained, I bused and I walked. I walked some more.

I managed to find a safe and comfortable enough place to stay last minute. I figured out a bus route to get to the job the next day. I found clothes. I missed my bus back home, but that would have to wait until the next day.

The next day I got to the job on time (early even) and waited. I did not know how long I would be there that day, as often is the case. I knew I could catch a bus later around 6:25pm and still get home at a decent hour to sleep and get ready for the next trip the following day to Phoenix, which I had to get to. But all of that depended on how long I was working today! As it turned out I worked until about 6:45 pm. Yikes. Later bus? Couldn't justify that. I walked back to bus stop and called an airlines while doing so and found a flight at 8:35 pm. I got to bus stop at 7:04 pm and waited for bus to arrive at 7:39 pm. Rode 20 minutes to Burbank Airport just in time for all emergency vehicles to come barreling into the parking structure right before the bus. No worries, I was close enough. I got off bus and literally ran all the way to the terminals, got boarding pass, flew through TSA and up to gate with a couple minutes to spare before boarding and speeding back home in record time.

In a nutshell, I got some sleep, did laundry, re-packed and headed out again the next day hitting everything I needed to do just in time. Whew!

Now, how could I not think that something positive had not happened over and over again during this chaotic time period.

I remember thinking, I could not have planned this better. I just kept saying to myself at every juncture, "Do I turn left or right?" Then I went with it. And, you know what? Things worked out. Amazing.

So that is my story last week. I hope you get something out of it to take with you in the new week ahead that reminds you about how staying positive and going with flow, begin calm cool and collected will generally pull you through such moments. It's nothing short of miraculous!

So even in the midst of chaos is a peace beyond all understanding that leads us through to where we need to be. That is the positive lesson I offer this week.

Go out there and make the most of every moment with a dash of positivity.

Cheers!

You Can Do This!

You Can Do This!

©Allen Merritt (2016)

The phrase of the week is, “You Can Do This!” I noticed it pop up at me while scrolling through my Instagram feed. It caught my attention as something to remember. Sounds like its own little pep talk, doesn’t it? You can do this. It has a sense of encouragement and positivity about it. And, it’s only four little words. I thought the phrase could work as our little On a Positive Note mantra for the week.  A bit of envouragement to brighten the day.

You Can Do This!


Try saying it out loud with various vocal inflections.

YOU can do this.

You CAN do this.

You can DO this.

You can do THIS.

Repeat it over and over when you are moving forward with the every day.

If you’re like me, sometimes you will need the reminder.

When you are getting what appears to be a run around at the bank and are told three different stories before someone actually gave you a straight answer forcing you to keep going back and forth three times from home to bank, home to bank, home to bank looking for the information they say they needed before you could finalize your paperwork. Tell yourself, ‘You can do this!”

If you are trying to keep track of a family member in the hospital and the facility keeps moving them from one wing to another and refusing to stay in contact with you as the “point of contact” so that you can be informed and make decisions accordingly, take a breath, be kindly assertive and remind yourself, “You can do this.”

When other individuals walk around like zombies heads buried in an electronic device not seeing, not watching, observing and/or looking like they are uncaring and apathetic despite the dangers they are causing, go ahead and shake your head, but find some humor, smile and sing out, “You can do this!” to yourself.

When you are given your boarding card and it’s number 12 to get on the bus and then several other people squeeze in and cut ahead of you who have number 36 and up claiming they are disabled when they so clearly are not. Remind yourself there are enough seats on the bus and everyone with a ticket with get one. “You can do this!”

On it goes day after day. We have to encourage ourselves to keep our mindset going in the right direction. Why? Because you can never totally predict where other people’s heads are at, what they are thinking, what they know, what is going on in their lives or anything for that matter. All we can do is adapt and adjust in the most positive manner possible and insist on getting it as right as possible for the betterment of all people, places and things.

Hurdles.? Obstacles? Bumps, humps and dips in the road?

You can do this!

Rude people? Obnoxious people? Selfish people?

You can do this!

If you have to say it out loud, do it.

If you feel like singing or shouting it with joyfulness, do it.

If you need to keep it to yourself prayerfully, go ahead.

Keep it positive and let yourself know that in any circumstance it’s okay and you can do it.

Better yet, mix it up. Remind yourself, “You can do this!” as if you are another person talking back at yourself. Then affirm the statement/mantra by saying, “Yes, I can do this!”

You can do this!

I can do this!

Doesn’t it simply sound good?

I think so and that’s my thought for the week.

You Can Do This!

I Can Do This!

We All Can Do This!

Spend the week reminding yourself repeatedly how you can do…anything!

Cheers.

Pushing Toward Happiness!

Pushing Toward Happiness!

©Allen Merritt (2016)

Well, another week has gone and passed us by. For me, as I have navigated my way through all kinds of curvy situations I have tried to make sure to make time to rest. I am amazed at how at times I feel utterly exhausted when I don't feel I should be. But when I look back on my experiences over the last couple of weeks I can see how fatigue comes into play not only with the daily grind, but from traveling, stressful situations that pop up unexpectedly and suddenly have to be dealt with and whatever else tackles us.

This past week I did have an opportunity to take a day job which landed me near downtown Los Angeles. I have a friend who had an apartment in the area and whenever I can and have time I contact them to see if they are around and available for a cup of Joe and a little visit. As it turned out, I only had to work a half a day, which was really nice and left me with definitive time to check in with my friend. I texted them and found out they were no longer in the area. They had moved out of town a couple hours east, a completely different town.

My friend proceeded to inform me of the fact that downtown had changed dramatically and was no longer what it used to be for them, ergo stimulating and prompting a change in life. Needless-to-say, I was surprised and had not expected this as I was under the understanding they loved living downtown and in the thick of it all. Plus, their career was center in the same industry as myself meaning they were near everything.

After congratulating my friend on their decision I added a note, “Here’s to happiness!”

I have been thinking on the idea of pushing through to happiness every since. When I hear about people’s struggles and difficulties in moving forward in life or in keeping the day to day going, I begin to think on how all the bumps in the road seem to trigger all kinds of reactions. Some of these reactions lead us to have a grumpy day or hit us the wrong way. My thought is to catch it when it happens and turn it around. For example, as I drove to the coffee shop today I experienced pedestrians crossing through major traffic zones in non-pedestrian areas and in the middle of traffic flow. My immediate thought was on why are they causing such a disturbance and putting themselves and other people in jeopardy? Interestingly, these pedestrians did not look to see if it was safe, did not yield to the traffic (since they did not have right of way) and they slowed down their pace to force traffic to stop around them. Not only was this a congestion, it was an endangerment which could have been prevented if they had walk further to the crosswalk. I felt grouchy over it and at the same time glad I was alert and spotted them.

Situations like that while small and petty can throw a hitch in your get along if you let them. So pushing forward toward our happiness is important. Just like my friend realizing she needed to move toward a better state of happiness because the changes in her area were not compatible with her goals and preferences. I can sense the frustration and the need for positive change. 

Some frustrations are health oriented. Others are financial or career based. In my circle, relationships are not even a consideration because folks are most focused on survival.

It is the same with the following situations which I hear about daily. 

• Lack of opportunities
• Not enough income
• Absence of any benefits
• Inability to achieve goals or dreams
• Various aspects of human interference's

I am certain you can think of many other situations popping up and causing you to reconsider the value of where you’re at, what you’re doing and whether or not making a positive change is necessary. Sometimes we are compelled to move on.

So my thoughts are centered on the importance of moving forward in life and pushing toward our happiness. Sometimes it is a simple change in attitude or thought process. Maybe a simple conversation might change circumstances or if need be, making a physical change and moving from one situation to another. The key issue is being aware and assessing our lot in life rationally and making changes accordingly. No matter what choices are made, thinking positive and asking yourself what makes you happiest and what needs to be done to realistically achieve that is the every day goal.

Let’s encourage happiness!

Go out and find your happy this week and stick to it!

Cheers.

Upload the Positive!

Upload the Positive!

©Allen Merritt (2016)

I walked onto the elevator to overhear two people in the middle of an uplifting conversation. It was a male and a female nurse. The male nurse was leading the discussion about how it was such a joyous day for him; and, when people have a tragedy happen to them they allow that tragedy to steal their joy and peace from them. But to him if you already have the joy, nothing can steal it away from you.

It was at this point the man walked closer to the woman and said, "You get what I'm saying, don't you sister?"

The woman replied, "Yes, I do. But I love to hear it."

The man went on, "Yeah, you need a little reminder."

"That's right. We need a little reminder. You have a blessed day!” whispered the woman before exiting the elevator and leaving me and the man to ourselves.

The man turned toward me and asked, "How are you doing, young man?"

"Good." I said.

"Good? Good is mediocre, man. You got to feel joyful!"

I said, "That's right, especially around here."

The man went on, "You got it! Got to upload the positive and delete the negative just like on a computer. Know what I'm saying?" (He said this while taking his finger and pointing it up towards his temple, as if to demonstrate.)

This happened as I was visiting my friend who had been admitted into the hospital over the weekend.

This male nurse was chockfull of energy, joyfulness and eager to share and celebrate all that life was offering despite any and all circumstances going on in the world around him or in general.

His energy was infectious and the idea of sharing his comment in today’s positivity blog seemed more than appropriate. We need to upload the positive and delete any negative content in our lives. That is what I aim to build, nurture, grow and share every week, no matter what!

In fact, the last couple of weeks have been challenging for me as I lost my best friend Scooter Dawg! That's right, my doggie passed away peacefully in his sleep while I was trying to make my way across country to catch up with old family and friends I had not seen in three years. It was a sad day, because I had Scooter for over 15 years and since he was 4 weeks old. He was my family. But despite his passing, I had expected it sooner than later and was extremely grateful he had gone peacefully. That is what this man was talking about when he said to upload the positive and delete the negative.

I want to keep that mentality as much as possible. I have even caught myself this week getting a little impatient with others who were being a bit pushy with me to take care of their needs when I am in the middle of a stressful situation in dealing with my friend in the hospital. For about a day I was feeling overwhelmed and taken advantage of. It appeared there was a lack of consideration and compassion taking place.  I had to remind myself how things may not be what they appear to be and maybe I was being too sensitive. Again, I was uploading the positive and getting rid of some negative.

In any case, here I am today and I was wondering what my blog content would entail when life delivers me this neatly packaged message that speaks for itself. I walked right off that elevator and knew I had to share the experience and the idea in today’s On a Positive Note blog.

So there you have it!

This week’s positive reminder is to upload the positive and delete the negative.

May we all be encouraged by such great energy and be reminded of how being positive and joyful means much more to our overall well-being than holding on to grudges, bad feelings or negative energy.

Go out there and have a great fun-tastic week, despite it all!

Cheers!