Finding Reasons to Celebrate!

Finding Reasons to Celebrate!
by Allen Merritt (©2017)

Holidays are great. I love them! I love the happy go lucky spirit they create that allows many of us to step out of our daily routines and find reasons to enjoy the bounties of life and rites of passage.
However, I find myself as often as not in an interesting juxtaposition regarding these traditions.

The truth is, I seldom celebrate holidays; at least, not in the traditional sense. As I think about it, I realize there are significant reasons for this and it causes me to pause a moment to reflect further on it. I do not see it as a self-pity trip or a “Woe is me” type situation.

Again, let me be clear. I love holidays and celebrations of all sorts, but as I look back on my experiences, I find life generally hasn’t led me down that path where I could participate in the same fashion as most people do.

For example, I worked on the second shift for 13 years for a company requiring its employees to work most holidays. I kind of got used to the idea that holidays don’t really exist. And, I observe many other people finding themselves in the same situation today. I respect them for sacrificing their time and energy to helping others have a good holiday. I guess someone has to do it. There is a positive result stemming from such individuals. 1) Hospitals need people to care for those in need. 2) Emergency responders are there just in case; 3) and, service industry employees are working to provide a need during the holiday hustle and bustle.

Another reason I believe my holiday bubble doesn’t exist revolves around limited to familial experiences. I am mostly on my own when it comes to family and friends. Everyone lives far away or goes away and so I generally keep it on the down low, so to speak.

My experiences with work even today are similar in that I could find myself off working somewhere at a moment’s notice at any time. I simply do not recognize the “Friday” or “Weekend” rule. Meaning, when most folks are celebrating time off Friday through Sunday, I usually am not. Friday could be any other day of the week for me.

I share these thoughts and experiences today as a means to recognize that despite it all there are still reasons and ways to celebrate life without sticking to a formula that such and such a day is the designated holiday, birthday, anniversary, weekend, vacation, etc.

For me, I have to find ways to celebrate without following such guidelines and schedules. Celebrating life, loving and living must be on my terms or under the best conditions I am able to work with. If you are living under similar circumstances, then I hope this provides enlightenment that life is always worth living no matter what. None of us are alone or living without in this arena. 

It seems to make sense to me. Heck, they even have Christmas in July more and more these days. Every day can be a holiday if we want them to be. If you want to celebrate, celebrate! It doesn't matter what day it is. Celebrate anyway! This has great bearing on our positive well being and mental attitude.

It encourages me to find more reasons to celebrate. I may not be able to do so in the same manner as John Q. Public might, but I can rest comfortably knowing I do so in my own way as time allows.

While I am not a party animal and my idea of celebration may vary drastically from most, I believe I can enjoy my moments in a peaceful and joyful way no matter what day of the year it is or what type of day we call it. Every day is special, because on some level every day is priceless and not guaranteed.

As we end one year and begin another, may we all see each day as a special day and find something positive in it that spurs a reason to celebrate. After all, life is what you make of it. Home is where the heart is. And, each day is as happy as we choose it to be.

Let’s find more humor, laughter, patience and loving kindness to bless each experience and situation we encounter.

Enjoy living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

To Have or To Have Not!

To Have or To Have Not!

©Allen Merritt 2017

It’s that time of year, isn’t it?

The spirit of the holidays is fast upon us and everyone is doing their best to encourage good cheer. At least, I think they are. I hope so. We certainly do not need any more Scrooge’s grumbling at the world.

The holidays have changed over the years with consumer growth and a push to collect contributions to every charity imaginable. Long commercial campaigns are seeking donations. One truth is apparent, there is incredible need out there and it’s growing. We do not have to go far to experience it or approach it. It’s on our doorsteps or close by to home. Many people continue to live paycheck to paycheck. Some simply live without.

While in Los Angeles last week I noticed something slightly different about the homeless epidemic. It is not only spreading out and growing, but seems to be wider in girth, so to speak. What I mean to say is that those who are living under such conditions are staking out more space individually on the sidewalks. Larger walls of sheets tied up to mark more territory are clearly evident.

Tents are popping up in areas they didn’t used to be. For example, on Sunset and Vine in a parking lot across from the Palladium I observed several homeless encampments right in the thick of the hustle and bustle. The situation is speaking for itself.

More and more people are living on the streets. And, baby its cold outside!

Today as I ran errands I caught a glimpse of a man in shorts wearing a sandal on one foot and a tennis shoe on the other. Do you suppose he is making the most of what he has? Another man was pushing a grocery cart serving as his storage facility while simultaneously walking his companion dog. Do you suppose he is grasping any sense of normalcy? After a while some of these faces become familiar.

Each day that goes by we live our life and experience it as only we know it and comprehend it. It’s a personal thing. Accordingly, it is an experience which resides within the realm of the relevant. Meaning, we understand things to the extent for which it is relevant to us.

Maybe our positive outlook ought to be defined more on our attitude for what we do have and not so much on what we don’t have. There is something to be said for that considering so many truly don’t have near as much as others.

Individually, we may not be able to solve the many problems in the world, but we can help not make it worse and try to offer a way to improve it. Helping ourselves and helping others can make us all feel better and more positive. We can contribute to improving life overall.

Let’s be mindful about the haves and the have nots.

Let’s be thoughtful that it isn’t all about me, me, and me!

Let’s think about giving back rather than gimme, gimme, gimme or mine, mine, mine!

As we journey through another holiday season, may all of us be reminded how lucky we are to have what we have and allow that revelation to positively inspire our attitudes from day to day.

Truth be told, there will always be something we feel we need. If we dwell on those things, we will never be happy, satisfied or feel complete or content.

Keeping this in mind, have a great week living life on a positive note.

Reach out and help others find their way and in that find a little of your own way. At the very least, let's do the best we can according to our individual means and capabilities. 

Cheers!

Standing Up to the Wind!

Standing Up to the Wind!

By Allen Merritt ©2017

Today gusts of wind are blowing upwards of 50 mph’s.

It seems like a sad day, although I am trying to pretend it is not.

Everything is flying around including dust, dirt, rocks, trash and anything left loose out in the open. It reminds me of the incredible amount of chaos taking hold of our country. It seems apropos and representative of how our worlds get thrown about and things seem all topsy turvy. There is a definitive feeling in the air things are not good and a great percentage of people are being placed in a position to suffer by the decisions being made up on the hill.

While it has yet to be seen how far these tactics will go or how destructive they will become there is no doubt people are sensitive to the hurt going on. Some are embittered, enraged, outraged and everything in between. Still there are others making effort to shine a positive light and discover new ways and outlooks on how to approach these issues in appropriate ways.

As I think on this, one thing I also noticed while traveling through this blustering windstorm is how the planes are still taking off and landing. Somehow the job still needs to get done and people must be somewhere soon in the safest way possible. The flight crew takes great effort to insure all will be well.

I think in light of the political climate impacting so many Americans we must remember we are human and we still need to find ways to live as peaceably as possible. Someway we must rise above the nonsense being shoved at us and focus on the betterment of the whole. Yes, I wish D.C. was actually thinking along the same lines, but I cannot make others be what they aren’t able to be and I certainly cannot insure they will do the best to represent our group of people.

However, what I can do is be reminded of my role in stabilizing my spirit toward that which is good for everyone. I can focus on “actually” making the place we live great again and not just throw words around. I can hone in on how to best represent myself and others. While the office of the president exists now in name only and whereby autocratic is replacing democratic I remain positive on certain issues related to making things better, improving health and well being through caring and sharing, nurturing and growing. I figure if history is going to repeat itself and many will lose, than we should work hard to be strong in the process.

The sadness is simply not worth it. Life is too short and these days are helping me look toward what it is I truly value. I am certain others feel the same.

This year we saw several devastating hurricanes rape and pillage communities. Winds kicked up fires across California among other geological disasters. Through all of these natural catastrophes humanity stood up and is flourishing one step at a time despite what is going on in that place called Washington.

So as the winds continue to blow and toss us around both literally and figuratively, may we all find reasons to be happy; discover opportunities to smile, laugh and encourage ourselves and our neighbors; and, turn off the noise until the wind settles down and the sun shines again. We may be shoved around and fall down a time or two, but we can also get right back up again. I think there is some sense of comfort in knowing that.

I’d like to take a moment to wish everyone good will and peace throughout the storm (s).

Here’s to living life on a positive note!

Cheers!

Getting the Last Laugh!

Getting the Last Laugh!

©Allen Merritt 2017

I love it when strange things happen out of the clear blue and afterwards you realize it was pretty funny. In hindsight, you start laughing and are thankful for the humor of it all and the clarity of making light of a moment.

For example, I was on the phone today clearing up some business with a financial institution. I was on speaker phone. I figure if I'm are going to be on hold for great lengths of time just to be able to speak to a person I might as well accomplish some cleaning chores. Anyway, a young man finally answered the phone asking how he could help. As I explained what I needed, the young man made a statement to the effect of, "I see the account you're referring to belongs to your husband. May I speak to your husband please?" 

OMG!

LOL!

ROTFLMAO!

I hesitated for a moment and then said, "I am not a woman." 

The young man must have been a little embarrassed as he laughed and made a comment about there is a poor connection on the line. 

Now, that's funny! 

Another moment I observed this week had to do with a woman I was working with who every time she went into the bathroom managed to come out with toilet paper trailing behind her. She was a tiny thing and never seemed to notice it. What made it even more lighthearted was how the big bodybuilder guy on set was the one who would stop and help remove the toilet paper. There was a sense of funny there coupled with loving-kindness. You got to love that!

Sometimes that kind of humor helps make the day roll along a little smoother, especially when you allow yourself a moment to chuckle over it. We need this in our day to day.

My mind loves to consider the funny possibilities. Such as the time when a lady called my phone and asked me if while I was out at the store if I could pick up a few extra items she had forgot to put on the list. Of course, I said I would. Then I hung up and laughed myself silly. I guess there was someone running around out there with my name picking up the groceries.

There have been a couple of times I would think to myself how funny it would be to walk up to someone and swat them on the backside and them run. Okay, that is a bit of a childish prank. But my internal laugh meter went off and lightened the moment. 

Sometimes I think the powers that be deliberately allow these situations to take place or people to cross our paths to remind us not to take everything so seriously. I think this is important, because I tend to be serious as often as not and have been accused of it repeatedly. But I find my funny bone is still intact. I notice things that make me laugh.

We can make each day more positive in seeing through little misunderstandings or mishaps. Call them hiccups, if you will, but there are moments which catch us off guard meant to lighten our day and our load with a touch of humor. It is too easy to fall into the trap of letting ourselves be sucked into the drama of it all. My suggestion is to let the unexpected shine its light once in a while and show us a little love.

I remember another time when I was taken aback when the person on the other end of the phone asked to speak to my wife. As a single man, my immediate thought was focused on did someone know something I didn’t? Did someone slip a ring on my finger when I was out of it? I guess the real question in these little moments is who is getting the last laugh?

My mother used to tell me that if I was going to make a big fumble I might as well be the first one to make it well known and get the most out of it before someone else took credit for bringing me down. I think this falls into the same category of getting the last laugh and finding humor in every situation. That’s not to say we are not to take situations seriously or forget responsibility and accountability. It simply means we all fall short of the glory and wander down a wrong path once in a while. We all trip up. We all react too quickly sometimes. We all misunderstand because we don’t know what is going on or have all the facts. Accordingly, assumptions are made such as the young man assuming I was a woman over the phone.

Who’s getting the last laugh?

Final answer - I hope it is you.

It may not always be about who is getting the last laugh, but are we laughing and finding ways to love our lives? With that in mind, may this week be one of finding positivity in those unexpected humorous moments.

And if you can, share that laugh with everyone else. Then we’ll all have a good time.

Here’s to living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Give a little! Receive a little!

Give a little! Receive a little!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

Just when you think no is paying attention, listening or watching (let alone acknowledging) you, someone says or does something to entertain the idea of how much you are appreciated. When that happens to me I feel that appreciation, but most of all I experience an overall sensation of blessedness.

We all need a little love to push us forward. Unfortunately, it may not come as often as it should anymore. We forget ourselves and others so easy - lost in the ways of the world and multiple distractions. I find if I am hearing the good comments, then I can allow them to rest peaceably within and guide me forward, because my overall well being needs a touch of human kindness now and again. I think this is a given for all of humanity. 

Give a little. Receive a little.

The challenge is to recognize those moments, hear those compliments, as well as accept and embrace those opportunities when they arrive. In other words, let others show they care. Let others love you. Let others see you, recognize and acknowledge you. When you do, your mind calms and your heart is enriched putting you in a perfect position to experience the best things in life.

Can you remember the last positive comment you received this week?

Can you think on when it was you last gave an encouraging word to someone?

Can you recall a compliment offered you recently?

Did you give someone a vote of confidence?

Have you received a bit of thanks for things you did for someone years ago?

Do you remember thanking someone for their place in your life?

All of these questions are worth pondering, especially in moments when you are questioning yourself and your place in the all in all.  We can give each other a little something to help us along in the day to day. But we also have to be aware we are receiving the same blessing(s) in return.

Here’s the challenge:

Try to think back on the recent past and see how many times you were given a vote of confidence, an encouraging comment or compliment and what your reaction was? Did you hear it? Did you receive it, accept it, and embrace it? Or, did it go in one ear and out the other? These little moments are like healing miracles and blessings at work in our lives to continue promoting our well being and state of happiness.

For me, I noticed three such events take place for me this week.

1. I received an e-mail from an old friend reminding me how much I helped them with a place to stay, offering storage space and friendship in time of need. They wrote, “I hung on your uplifting words.  For that time in my life I thank you so very much. I don’t know if Thank you is enough.  God bless you for your kindness. You are a human angel.  I bet you are still sharing your light.” (Should I pull out a tissue now?)
2.  The barista at one of the local coffee shops started a conversation after they remembered my name to put on the coffee order. They said they were not good with names. I simply stated, “It’s okay, as long as you do not call me Kim, Sue or Peaches.” Their comment to that was, “I don’t know, Peaches sounds nice, especially since you always have a nice smile.” (Awww! I never think of anyone noticing me smiling anymore.)
3. Then today my friend with Alzheimer’s received a visitor I’ve know for a while, but have not been close to. As they left, they reached out and hugged me and said, “Thank you; for everything. What you are doing is enormous.”  I wasn’t expecting that. I smiled lightly and quietly told them how much I appreciated that. It was a feel good moment. Such moments can break down barriers!

You see, just when you think no one is noticing, looking, paying attention, seeing you or hearing you, someone offers such grace and love. It sparks a little light inside. My final point in sharing my thoughts and experiences is to never give up. Never think that what you’re doing or saying isn’t making a difference, because to someone it is. And, when you need it most, it comes back to you a hundred fold.

Remember to offer a little more human kindness and loving kindness to yourself and others. Everyone needs it. And one other thing, it sure is a sight better than tearing someone down, bullying them or shaming them for no reason at all.

Give a little.

Receive a little.

Enjoy the best of the best this week living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Skip To My Lou, My Darling!

Skip To My Lou, My Darling!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I saw a man skipping today.

That’s right!

I observed a full grown man skipping down the sidewalk, bobbing up and down in true skippity fashion. He filtered in and out of pedestrians, all of whom were making their way somewhere. The difference was that they were simply walking.

Oh, yes! This caught my eye. It captured my attention and I wondered what he was up to. It’s not every day you see an adult male skipping down the lane; a child, yes, but not an adult. When I think of skipping, I quite naturally think of children (girls in particular) on a playground or in a park. I think of them skipping rope. Moreover, I picture boys skipping rocks or skipping class, because boys do not skip…or do they?

Remember that old popular children’s song from 1840?

Skip, skip, skip to my lou
Skip, skip, skip to my lou
Skip, skip, skip to my lou

Skip to my lou, my darlin'

Here was sufficient evidence to prove how some boys can and do skip. Here was a man skipping along carefree and with apparent wild abandon. I sensed a spirit of freedom and happiness associated with this act of skipping, as if he was making a statement to the world. How could anything be wrong? Isn't that fun?

It made me think of other sightings such as singing baristas and waiters or dancing homeless people, because when you find yourself witnessing such events, you have to stop and take it in. Sometimes it’s unexpected such as when you stumble upon a flash mob. These events bring about a sense of joy and wonder, if only for a moment. I believe every act of silliness or joy is well worth the investment of instilling peace in our soul. If anything, it will certainly give you something to think about or even talk about throughout the rest of the day. 

In this case, here was another example of positivity literally in motion. This happens despite anything and especially in the face of negativity. And maybe that is the way it should be. After all there are song lyrics encouraging us to do so. “Dance like no one is watching.” “Do it anyway.” “Sing because you’re happy.” “Smile and the whole world smiles with you.”

Needless-to-say, this event definitely brought a smile to my face.

It made sense to me, especially in terms of positive self-expression.

Be you.

Be Free.

Be!

Whatever you are going to do, do it with wild abandon, wholeheartedly and unabashedly. Do it BECAUSE they are watching. Smiles are infectious. So is laughter. Spread the good feelings. Start a contagion of positivity. Don’t skip a beat, but skip to your own beat.

There is nothing like that feeling we get when someone makes us smile or genuinely laugh.

I know skipping may feel awkward, but have you tried it lately? It just might change your tune from sad to happy. If children can do it, so can we.

I’m willing to try it if you are!

Let’s find time this week to get a little skippy with it! Don’t have a rope to skip? That’s okay! It’s not required. Just lift up one knee and jump/hop a little, lift the other knee and jump/hop a little and repeat! Before you know it your skipping along enjoying the day!

Here’s to living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Our State of “Tude”!

Our State of “Tude”!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I was thinking this morning about “tudes.”

What’s a “tude”, you might ask?

Well, a “tude” (generally speaking) refers to an attitude of any kind.

Over coffee, I pondered the abbreviated form of a “tude.”  I jotted down ideas and words that relate to it as I wondered about the positive aspects of how “tudes” impact our lives.  How many “tudes” are there? Which ones give us the most bang for our buck in the way of feeling good or obtaining enlightenment, peace of mind or contentment?

Let’s face it, our attitude means everything toward how we face each day. If we wake up grumpy, it may take a while to turn the frown upside down! Ultimately, it is my belief that a positive attitude will serve us better in the long run rather than any negative one. The right “tude” can determine our mood, dude!  More importantly, it garners a better outcome overall.

Here are a few thoughts I want to propose for helping us improve our state of “tude.”

Gratitude – naturally finding something to be grateful and/or thankful for helps place us in a state of appreciation for aspects of our life. It’s humbling. It’s also a form of recognition toward understanding that the whole of life is a gift and not necessarily something that comes to us on a silver platter and/or with a silver spoon. Nothing is ever guaranteed even when one works hard to believe and achieve. To me, gratitude is my number one “tude.” We are blessed with the opportunity to pursue and give it our all. Without gratitude everything will mean nothing and is taken for granted.

Solitude – taking a moment here and there to be with ourselves and reflect on anything and everything going on in life. This is a very important “tude.” If we do not take time to think on, contemplate and ponder how we feel, what we know and understand or figure out where we stand on issues and situations, then we only become more and more blithely unaware of our circumstances. We get too caught up in the world and forget who we are, what’s important and where we are heading. Solitude helps us regroup, reassess, reevaluate as we move forward and navigate.

Beatitude(s) - help us form character and integrity. While generally thought of in religious context, there are many benefits from these thoughtful proclamations. They remind us to be humbled, passionate, forgiving, gentle, self-controlled, thoughtful, tolerant, comforting, peace seeking and more. The Beatitudes contribute greatly to our daily recipe for living.

We-attitude – reminds us to focus on inclusiveness and social consciousness. While a ‘Me-attitude’ may prove important to our general health and well being, a’ We-attitude’ helps serve to balance out everything else.  At some point one realizes we are all in the same boat and it isn’t always about the almighty Me, Myself and I.  On some level, this “tude” reminds us of our social connected-ness in the world.

Overall, attitude changes the outcome of any initiative. You can have a bad-itude, be crude, lewd and rude and the outcome will result in the same return on your investment. It’s like being repeatedly slapped in the face. I don’t think anyone likes that.  Yet, I do notice this happening a lot out there in the real world. People are letting their “tudes” get the best of them and others. They lash out, scream, bully, objectify, purposefully attack people and wreak havoc, which only promotes destructiveness.

Attending to those “tudes” which promote growth and understanding helps everyone live life on a more positive note, don’t you think?

Considering these theories on “tudes,” I hope each and every day will reflect the best of the best. May our attitudes promote us toward a higher gain and not lead us down a path of ugliness.

With that in mind, have a great week living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Lighten the Load!

Lighten the Load!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I try to be observant and pick up on signs, symbols and word play. It comes natural for me to do so. Sometimes it happens so fast I don’t even know where it comes from. I tell people, “It just came to me out of nowhere” or “It flew out of me like a demon.”  Somehow I see unexpected things in the normal ebb and flow, which help to lighten the load, so to speak.

In any case, I look for positivity throughout the day and this is one way I do it.

For me, the last few weeks have been chalk full of activities and I found myself quite fatigued at the end of each day, which is a good thing. When I get this busy I often feel I am forgetful or lose track of time in regard to being observant or observing what I feel is important in life. It is almost like forgetting to eat because you are constantly on the go. I suppose the best approach is to not let any of it get the best of you or to beat yourself up over anything. If the chores are not a hundred percent complete, that’s okay. If you have to put things off for a few extra days, that’s okay. If you forget something, that’s okay. It’ll still be there later, because tomorrow never comes.

Ultimately, I try to keep it light when in the company of others and will crack a few jokes and sillies along  the way, or share true stories of things I noticed or experienced that were not what one would expect. Here are a couple of interactions I had this week. I hope it helps others to see how to lighten one’s own load as we continue living life on a positive note.

1. A discussion about an upcoming trip to Chicago came up and I immediately blurted out, “Do you know how many ‘chicks’ are in Chicago?” Answer, “Nearest I can tell there is only one ‘Chick’ in Chic(k)-ago!”
2. While driving to work and about to pull into the conference center I came to a stop at the light. What I thought was a homeless individual approached the car in front of me. He was holding up his pants and carried a large red guitar drinking cup (popular in Vegas). I reached into the back seat where I had a small bag of snacks to give out in just this kind of a situation. The man shuffled up to my car. I rolled down the window and asked him if he wanted a snack pack. His reply was, “No, I want you to take me to a strip club. I will pay you $5.”  Needless-to-say, I chuckled and said, “No, I am pulling in here.” I certainly wasn’t expecting that type of interaction, especially at 5:00 am in the morning when I wasn’t even sure if I was awake yet. I can tell you, I was awake after that!
3. While enjoying an after work reception in the exhibit hall following the conference day, I saw what I thought was a squeezable rubber stress toy shaped like a dog with a yellow ball in his mouth. (Try and picture this!)  I had a plastic cup of Cabernet Sauvignon in one hand, a plate of pink butternut ravioli in the other hand and a bag over my shoulder. Yes, my hands were full. Anyway, I went up to the booth and asked if I could have the stress toy, because I thought it was fun. A young man encouraged me to take one, which I did. While juggling everything and having to switch my plate to the other hand and place it on top of my beverage, I reached and grabbed the toy and began to squeeze it like a stress ball. The yellow ball that was in the dogs mouth immediately popped out and shot up in the air and so did my pink ravioli, which went all over the floor. I began to apologize and laugh like crazy. The scene was too funny. I didn’t expect the ball to pop out at all. But I am glad it did. It truly lit up the moment with a heightened sense of fun.

How many times have such moments caught your attention and allowed you to stop and see the good things in life? Take a moment to reflect back on your week and count how many times fun and interesting events filled up your moments with opportunities to lighten up and reduce your stress. Take advantage of these little humor breaks to create more positive space throughout the day. Use these moments to accentuate the positive.

With that in mind, take notice of what is going on around you and what is being said. 

Go out and have a fun filled and joyous week living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Grab the Goodies!

Grab the Goodies!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

How many times have you heard the words, “As soon as…; when…; or, if…” preceding a sentence and used in context of choosing to view life either positively or negatively? When do we decide to make things happen regardless? Why does the time always have to be perfect for us to move forward or make effort?

Last night I listened to a short presentation on choosing peace and refuting the idea of taking a negative stance or beating oneself up over nothing. If we open the eyes of our minds and heart, take a look around, we may find the time to move forward is right now. We may discover good things are abundant as are the opportunities.

No one needs a REASON to be happy.

No one needs a REASON to be peaceful.

The “When this happens, then I will do this or that” mentality only slows down and/or potentially eliminates possibilities to achieve. It creates a self-inflicted wound and brings about self-fulfilling prophecies, which leave us empty handed.

My experience with this comes from my mother. After listening to this mindset, one realizes such talk produces nothing fruitful. In fact, it serves only as an excuse for not giving it a go!  Negative thinking has a powerful nature about it toward interfering with goals and dreams. It stifles the ability to become…more. It stunts our growth.

Consider the following statements:

• I don’t deserve it.
• I don’t think I can.
• I don’t know how.
• I just can’t!
• Now’s not the right time.

No matter how big or small a thing it is we want to accomplish, we must recognize we have the innate ability to approach it positively. Or, at the very least, we can refute it.

• I deserve the best.
• I think I can!
• I’m not sure how, but I will try.
• I can learn.
• There’s no time like the present.

My goal this week is to propose an exercise for choosing the good. Let’s call it, “Grab the Goodies!”

First, we must decide there is a world of good out there. Then we have to surround ourselves with such goodness and experience it fully by working to identify every aspect of the good. We may even have a change of heart/perspective as a part of the process.

Start by checking out the surrounding environment. Find something good. Point it out to yourself. Then say, “That is good” followed by a smile and an affirmative head shake and then use the button of, “This is good!”

Sound simple? It is!

Sound silly? It’s not.

Searching for the positive (or good) is habit forming and becomes not only addictive but infectious to others. It helps to avoid jumping the gun, over reacting or speaking too soon, providing a chance for the positive to permeate the situation.

In some cases, finding the good may prove difficult at best. Think of the process as a scavenger hunt and seek out the buried treasure. One gem is all it takes to turn things around. Once found, grab it and hold on to it!

Think of the game as a sort of Halloween event of trick or treating.

Grab the goodies!

Look for the positive.

Make a better day.

We’ve nothing to lose by going for it now.

Imagine it. See it clearly. Place it in full view.

Grab those goodies. Give yourself a chance.  Don’t wait until "whenever". Do it now. What are you waiting for? 

Go out and have a great day harvesting all that is good and living your life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Shoot With a Camera!

Shoot With a Camera!

by Allen Merritt (©2017)

There is no doubt it takes a strong constitution to remain positive in light of ongoing chaos. It’s challenging to say the least. I read an online post this morning which conveyed how this individual usually tries to keep everything on a positive note, but how this is the hardest time in his life to do so.

I understand.

Yesterday another shooter attacked a small country church in Texas.

Earlier this week, a man went on a rampage in New York City and randomly killed people out biking, running, walking and enjoying an otherwise beautiful day.

It wasn’t that long ago where one man rained gunfire down on a concert just three miles from where I live.

On it goes and no one does anything about it in the way of taking measures to reduce the possibility of these events from taking place. (This is not a post about gun control, right to bare arms or any amendment. It’s about seeing clearly and knowing what to do.)

Here is what I notice. People are angry. People are hurting. People are lost in their own mental fog and then are imploding in such a fashion it impacts anyone and everyone in their pathway.

And it isn’t just random shootings. Law enforcement is caught in the act of shooting to kill without question or investigation. Ultimately, people die. Families are losing loved ones.

Positivity is always a work in progress for anyone, especially in today’s world.

How does one feel safe going out in public?

It’s a big question and it comes without a guarantee.

This week I found myself in another situation which I felt was shady and uncertain considering recent/ongoing shootings and terrorist attacks. A group of people behaving unusually were working around me at a local conference. They purposefully spoke in another language. I wasn’t sure if it was Hebrew or Arabic from a distance. One was on a phone speaking angrily. They were selling skin care products, which was odd considering it was a nursing organization. They served no purpose being there. Then I noticed there was another table of similar individuals selling electronics (cell phone accessories). This caused me to consider all the cell phone bombs used today. Then more people showed up until I counted at least eight. I observed two of them performing daily prayer rituals.  Then I walked past the leader and he looked straight into my eyes and all I saw was pure darkness. It pierced me to the point of wondering what I should do. What was going on, I wondered?

I began questioning whether or not to report them. I did not want to overreact. I reached for peace in the situation. Could this be a serious situation? I located exits and had small discussions to investigate. On the one hand I do not want to stereotype people or put them in a box. On the other hand, when I add up all the variables which were out of place in this scenario, something was off. Something was wrong. I have felt this way before when I had another similar experience on a plane leaving San Francisco the day of the Paris attack and observed highly questionable activity.

I share these experiences to point to the idea that it isn’t easy to know what to do or how to be objective. However, when there is an uncomfortable feeling, don’t ignore it. Go within and calmly reason through it. Be mindful, prayerful and contemplative toward a positive outcome and truth seeking.

For me, instead of simply looking outside of myself and thinking, ‘What is going on?” This time I decided to go inside and think thoughts like, “What should I do? What can I do? What is best to do? How can I help?”

I reached out to others to ask them to send good thoughts and energy, to join me in a partnership toward a peaceful outcome.

Interestingly, my feelings were not such that some major event took place that day as it did in Texas and NYC this week. But it did turn out some shady events were going on with this group in the exhibit hall and they were conducting unethical business practices which were scamming other innocents in the mix.

Keeping life on a positive note may mean not ignoring your feelings, but paying attention to them. If your gut is telling you to look into a situation or walk the other way, it may prove to be the most positive experience of your life.

In light of all who have suffered these great atrocities, I hope we can come together in support of life sustaining measures to prevent such madness.

For me, I tend to walk away from people who I visually see carrying guns in public.

Today, I simply wanted to share some of my thoughts and experiences. I am thankful for each day, but I hurt for those who needlessly have theirs cut short.

As I watched the news, I tired of listening to reporters ask questions they know for a fact have no answers and would impede investigation. As I scrolled through social media posts, I see people speaking out and some were tired of hearing politicians send prayers instead of taking action.

Personally, I think prayer and good thoughts/vibes toward pursuing healing, happiness, positivity and the like are a strong aide in moving past and forward into the next moment, but I also think stronger measures need to be discovered and implemented toward controlling that which is currently out of control: people accessing and handling weapons of all kinds of destruction.

Go ahead. Send your prayers. Pray without ceasing. Seek peace in the midst of the storm that will surpass any and all understanding and then work hard to overcome and to achieve actions that benefit the better part of the whole while promoting and supporting life, loving and living.

If you want to shoot a thing, grab a camera. Take a picture of something beautiful. Make a meaningful movie. Plant a flower bulb, water it and watch the shoot bloom into a wondrous act of life.  All lives matter. Let’s get behind that.

Go out there and be the best you can be right here and right now and have a positive week despite it all.

Cheers!

Master of None!

Master of None!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

There is an old saying/cliché which I dare say many people can relate to, which is, “Jack of all trades, master of none.” In a nutshell, this phrase suggests how people do not gain wealth and security because they have not mastered or developed an expertise in any one thing. Therefore, their success in life is comparatively limited. On one hand I understand it. On the other hand, the world has changed.

Personally, I relate to this statement. However, I have a different take on it, which I think lands me on the positive side of living. As a result of my perspective, I have survived and continue onward in the face of all my experiences.

Here is the way I see it. For me, life has been on my own. I am an only child. My family ties are limited. Nothing was ever given to me on a silver platter. To navigate the whole of my life I must work. No one else will provide or support me (either monetarily or morally). Support structures are minimal and finding areas where I am embraced and accepted by mere virtue of who I am barely exist.

Think on the following questions.

• How many individuals find themselves in this boat?
• How many people are depressed, suicidal and gravitate toward substance abuse and addiction?
• How many aren’t able to cope and feel uninspired, unmotivated and uncertain of their options?
• How may have already given up hope or given up period?
• What are the numbers when it comes to persons who feel their life is meaningless and they will never succeed at anything in life?

All are good questions. And, as someone who has been utterly on their own in much the same manner as these questions would purport, I always wonder how I make it through and some do not.

What makes me different?

I think the answer lies in the ideology of being blessed with the ability to find a perspective (even if it takes time to achieve it), as well as focusing on the many available options, which leads me back to the concept of jack of all trades.

My experience in life is based on being able to do many things. It pays to be diverse and versatile. That is how you make it through the roller coaster ride. For me, as a starving artist type, learning to jump in and wear many hats has paid off in seeing me through the tough times where opportunities were limited and money was short. If I were not able to adjust and adapt to my conditions and environments, I may have been utterly out of luck on the street.

The choice was mine.

From my experience, being an expert at something doesn’t guarantee success, opportunity or continued survival in your field of expertise. At least, in this day and age, the old cliché does not stand up to the weather. One can see this in how many individuals graduate with a degree in their chosen field and end up working jobs that have nothing to do with their profession. Moreover, many companies hire people who have the ability to wear more than one hat as they do not have the means to hire a one trick pony, so to speak.

With this in mind, I believe that one way to approach life positively is by buckling up and learning how to do more things. One cannot be afraid to be a jack of all trades. A skill (or set of skills) may or may not set you apart. Ultimately, success is how you define it, not as others tell you it is.

In short, my challenge for everyone is to look at all you are capable of doing and all that you do instead of brooding over what you do not have or feel you can’t do or are being kept from doing. Positivity begins with opening up our minds and hearts to the many things we are able to do in service to others and to ourselves.

Go ahead and be a jack of all trades. It doesn’t mean you cannot be a master at something or all things. It simply means you are alive and doing the best you can with what you have. In that, you move forward. Hopefully, on a happier and joyous note!

Have a great week and be positive about yourself!

Cheers!

When You Least Expect It!

When You Least Expect It!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

Today I feel the need to share.

Not long ago I had an incredible set of experiences filled with unexpected beautiful and interesting (if not quirky) tidbits while I was on a two day work related trip. I found myself amazed at how life played itself out, which I realize it always does one way or another.

When our hearts, minds, souls and spirits are open to whatever is offered up to us, one can see more peaceful moments in life for which to embrace and accept as part of who we are. I think as a part of our innate human nature we all have the ability (and power) to constantly move forward even when it seems we are standing in place.

As a precursor to this couple of days, I would like to mention that a couple weeks prior I intentionally took four days off to rejuvenate my spirit after losing a family member and finding myself surrounded by a feeling of sadness, which is only normal. Unfortunately, the trip did not result in rest and relaxation as I found myself responding to daily situations to help or serve others and running here and there all over the place to meet those needs. Even though I got a little beach time in, the trip was not what I wanted or expected it to be. However, it did seem to be what it was supposed to be and I found blessings in those moments, but I understood some of my immediate needs were not met. It wasn’t what I expected or hoped for.

Fast forward to the current trip, I flew into beautiful weather, which produced an instantaneous calmness in me. I got off the plane and boarded a bus and observed the driver happily reading and studying a manuscript written in Arabic, which I found interesting as I do not see this often. I realized I was in a city of diversity which allows anyone from anywhere to be who they are, which does not necessarily reflect on the state of global atrocities.  I felt a sense of peace.

I was whisked away to a friend’s house for a night of sitting on the patio near the ocean and simply enjoying the company and conversation of nothing in particular while having a glass of wine and grilling dinner. 

Afterward, once back at the hotel I realized my phone was missing. I lived without the phone for an entire twelve hours, which I guess for any of us, is a real feat these days. I discovered a blessing in that.

My hotel room had a wonderful view of the bay and the blue sky and fresh air was lovely and soothing. The sunshine and sunsets were captivating.

The next day I had a long 4 hour lunch break and off we went for a drive as would happen the second day as well. I found myself enjoying elements and areas of the city I had not seen before almost like I was on vacation. I was completely peaceful and calm. I felt in my true element, if you will. And, on the first day having this break I was driven back to my friend’s house where I found the missing phone, another little blessing.

The last evening was dinner overlooking the water and good conversation filled laughter and a long walk along the bay.

The final day found me back at the airport on a flight with only 38 people aboard; plenty of legroom and several rows to spread out and chill. The view from the window of the plane was like watching a movie. It moved from one incredible scene to another from a golden hue on the ocean as the sun settled for the day to a puffy bunch of clouds below which looked more like Antarctica terrain than clouds. It was a quick trip home to meet up with out of town guests for a quick dinner before they left, yet another blessing.

Long story short, the rest and relaxation I was looking for on the previous excursion did not present itself until this trip.

Everything I experienced in only a couple of days was completely unexpected and enjoyable even though I was technically on a business outing. I found myself constantly amazed and thankful.

Sometimes the most positive experiences we have are when we least expect them, but the important part of these moments are when we recognize them.

My hope in sharing this story is that each one of us look for the best in every opportunity to see the positive aspects of each moment, because they come when we least expect them and not always as we would plan them.

Have a stupendous week living life on a positive note.

Cheers and Enjoy!

Careful What You Ask For!

Careful What You Ask For!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I responded to a woman’s request today.

She was seated next to me at a coffee shop browsing away on her laptop when she leaned over and asked, “What is the area code here?”  I was entrenched in reading and wasn’t sure I was hearing her correctly, so I responded, “Excuse me?” She then repeated herself and I quickly responded with the answer, “702.”

Following my answer the woman again asked me, “What is the area code here?” I repeated myself to make sure she heard me correctly. In fact, I over enunciated it, “7-0-2!”

Evidently she was not satisfied with my answer and questioned me again, “No, I am asking what the area code is here…for this area.” Peering over my reading glasses, I reiterated my response only to discover this is not what she wanted to know...at all.

Ultimately what she actually wanted to know was what the zip code for the area was. Can you believe that? I had to go through all of this decoding and interpretation to finally figure out what she was asking in order to give her a satisfactory response when all the woman needed to do was ask for what she wanted to know from the very start. I would have helped in any way I could if I had known what she wanted.

If this lady had simply formatted her question correctly the first time, neither of us would have gone through this ordeal. Now, don’t get me wrong. It wasn't a big deal to me, just a befuddling one.

It brings me to the thought on being careful what you pray for, you just might get it, as well as being careful what you ask for lest you receive it.  I gave the woman exactly what she asked for. How could I have possibly known it was not what she wanted?

Sometimes we experience exactly what we ask for even though it is not truly what we want, which goes to show us how important it can be to look before we leap and think before we speak. To achieve positive results, one must think carefully and conscientiously.

In this situation, something as simple as understanding how to ask for the ZIP code versus an AREA code made a conversation (an innocent interaction) go from a positive experience to a potentially negative one.

Do we frustrate and stress ourselves by starting such conversations inaccurately? Do we do the same unto others we are making such inquiries of? If you do not know what you are asking for, how can you attain what you want? Furthermore, if you do not know what you want, how can you achieve the result you aspire to?

I guess in order to turn things around from negative to positive we must consider the situation prior to initiating it.

If you ask for something and you get it only to discover it’s not what you wanted, how will you respond or react? Will you make best use of that information to move forward or use it to start an argument?  Will you realize the error and learn better how to make inquiry the next time or will you make the correction right away and turn things around so the desired result will manifest itself?

While this situation did not begin an argument, it was a bit perplexing. I realize how quickly it could have turned into an explosive situation depending on one’s initial reaction and the brevity of the matter, because I have seen it happen before; all over a misunderstanding brought on by a minor error.

I suppose the reason I decided to bring up the conversation is because I am always interested in producing positivity. Negative situations often fuel further negativity when inappropriately presented or inappropriately handled. We cannot expect the responding party to read our minds and fully understand that when we are asking for something what we really are asking for is something else. If you ask for an area code, you are most likely going to get an area code. But if you really want the zip code, the obvious thing is to ask for the zip code.  Initially it seems simple, but how many times does this kind of interaction take place producing a completely different result than one might expect.

Ultimately, making sure we do not leave ourselves open to too much inaccurate interpretation or misinterpretation leads to stronger relations and more positive results, I would dare say.

The reason I see this as important is because all too often we wonder why we are not getting what we want when we ask for something. It may be because we didn’t really ask for the right thing to lead to the desired result. The other side of that coin is how easy it is in today’s over-saturated and over opinionated world of social media to be put in a box because of what we say, don’t say, do or don’t do initiates negative responses from others.

In conclusion, it just might pay handsomely for us to think twice before we ask, say or do anything. Otherwise, we will get exactly the opposite of what we expect or desire. Is getting what you ask for what you want?

It’s a tough row to hoe as they say!

But it is something to keep in the forefront of our minds as we navigate along.

With that in mind, I think we should be careful what we ask for, how we ask for it, what we say and how we phrase it, because you never know what kind of response you will get if you ask or say something inaccurately. No one is perfect!

It’s something to think about as we head on into a new week living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Happy On Purpose!

Happy On Purpose!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I saw a graphic displaying a statement reading something to the effect of being happy on purpose or rather, the purpose of life is happiness. What a great thought. The picture showed a person laughing. I loved it. After thinking on it further I made the comment to be happy on purpose because it is the purpose of living and posted it on my twitter feed to share with the universe, if you will.

There are many books and programs available promoting ideas on how to get, pursue and maintain a state of happiness. I have read a few of them and enjoyed them tremendously including Happier Than God, Ten Percent Happier, Happiness NOW! and Stumbling on Happiness. If you are feeding your spirit with good thoughts and ideas of happiness how can you not benefit or reap something by doing so? It’s like osmosis. Something good generates out of such effort. 

There is something else to consider though.

I think you can read as many books as you want, watch many programs or attend a ton of conferences discussing similar topics, but if you are not taking the information to heart and finding a way to utilize it and make it applicable to your life, it means nothing and won’t make any difference to you.

Ergo, the statement to be happy on purpose comes into play. Make it a point to do good things on purpose. Then it becomes a habit. If you want to be happy, then you will be happy.

What does it mean to be happy on purpose? I mean, what does happiness look like when you see it in action?  Is it people laughing, smiling and walking hand in hand with one another? Are there various levels of happy?

I have a friend who I believe resembles this idea quite a bit. I always admire this quality in him. He knows how to go out and purposefully have a good time and find ways to be happy in his own unique way. He works hard. He plays hard. Grant it, his ways of being happy and having fun are not my own, but it works on him. I see this much like the clothing we choose to wear. Clothing styles may look better on some people then they do on others. The way my body is built requires a different take on what I can wear. It’s the same with personality and pursuit of happiness, don’t you think?

For example, some people find their happy in a bar every weekend. They meet a group of friends, go dancing and drinking and it makes them feel good and alive (or at least lively). It’s a let your hair down and cut loose mentality. For them, this is a must at the end of the work week.

What happens when such an environment no longer inspires happy?

My thought?

I will be one of the first to suggest that if something doesn’t contribute to your happiness or if you are unhappy in a situation, then it is up to you to change it in some way.

If one way doesn’t (or no longer) work for you, then find your happy another way.  Recognizing that happiness is something you work on and allow to be; simultaneously. Individual likes and dislikes help guide the inner spirit toward that which determines where your happy lives.  I would also point out changing our environment is not always the solution to how we perceive our happiness playing out. Finding new ways to spark that happy right where you are and simply as you are with might work, too. Running away or escaping one situation as you trade it in for another is not what I mean by being happy on purpose.

I saw a great posting today which fits into this discussion. It said, “The grass is always greener where it is watered.” So to grow, to enhance, to enrich to build upon and nurture one must focus on watering and feeding that which we want to harvest. If that is happiness, then farm it up! This is another way of suggesting be happy on purpose. 

Here’s another thought. Standing in one place is not necessary a solution once you find a happy spot. Life moves. Situations change. A good example of this is watching a new building rise up next door that now will block your million dollar view. We must constantly be aware and reassess where we are in our state of happy; determine what is the root of that happy. It doesn’t mean packing up and moving out. It simply means things may change. In any case, thinking purposefully on sustaining and maintaining our state of happiness may help keep us in a happy place right where we are, which leads to living in a positive state as well. It’s about evaluating your inner well being and speaking to that child within.

Elements of happy may simply come to you quite naturally. I would say those moments are like seeds. Plant those seeds deep in your heart, spirit and soul and care for them.

In so thinking, I hope this week leads you down many paths of happy. If not, utilize the best resources you have available to start your own grass root garden project and cultivate your own happy. Be deliberate. Be happy on purpose!

Why?  Because the purpose of living is to be happy.

Produce your own brand of happy this week and have a great time living life on a positive note.

Cheers!