Careful What You Ask For!

Careful What You Ask For!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I responded to a woman’s request today.

She was seated next to me at a coffee shop browsing away on her laptop when she leaned over and asked, “What is the area code here?”  I was entrenched in reading and wasn’t sure I was hearing her correctly, so I responded, “Excuse me?” She then repeated herself and I quickly responded with the answer, “702.”

Following my answer the woman again asked me, “What is the area code here?” I repeated myself to make sure she heard me correctly. In fact, I over enunciated it, “7-0-2!”

Evidently she was not satisfied with my answer and questioned me again, “No, I am asking what the area code is here…for this area.” Peering over my reading glasses, I reiterated my response only to discover this is not what she wanted to know...at all.

Ultimately what she actually wanted to know was what the zip code for the area was. Can you believe that? I had to go through all of this decoding and interpretation to finally figure out what she was asking in order to give her a satisfactory response when all the woman needed to do was ask for what she wanted to know from the very start. I would have helped in any way I could if I had known what she wanted.

If this lady had simply formatted her question correctly the first time, neither of us would have gone through this ordeal. Now, don’t get me wrong. It wasn't a big deal to me, just a befuddling one.

It brings me to the thought on being careful what you pray for, you just might get it, as well as being careful what you ask for lest you receive it.  I gave the woman exactly what she asked for. How could I have possibly known it was not what she wanted?

Sometimes we experience exactly what we ask for even though it is not truly what we want, which goes to show us how important it can be to look before we leap and think before we speak. To achieve positive results, one must think carefully and conscientiously.

In this situation, something as simple as understanding how to ask for the ZIP code versus an AREA code made a conversation (an innocent interaction) go from a positive experience to a potentially negative one.

Do we frustrate and stress ourselves by starting such conversations inaccurately? Do we do the same unto others we are making such inquiries of? If you do not know what you are asking for, how can you attain what you want? Furthermore, if you do not know what you want, how can you achieve the result you aspire to?

I guess in order to turn things around from negative to positive we must consider the situation prior to initiating it.

If you ask for something and you get it only to discover it’s not what you wanted, how will you respond or react? Will you make best use of that information to move forward or use it to start an argument?  Will you realize the error and learn better how to make inquiry the next time or will you make the correction right away and turn things around so the desired result will manifest itself?

While this situation did not begin an argument, it was a bit perplexing. I realize how quickly it could have turned into an explosive situation depending on one’s initial reaction and the brevity of the matter, because I have seen it happen before; all over a misunderstanding brought on by a minor error.

I suppose the reason I decided to bring up the conversation is because I am always interested in producing positivity. Negative situations often fuel further negativity when inappropriately presented or inappropriately handled. We cannot expect the responding party to read our minds and fully understand that when we are asking for something what we really are asking for is something else. If you ask for an area code, you are most likely going to get an area code. But if you really want the zip code, the obvious thing is to ask for the zip code.  Initially it seems simple, but how many times does this kind of interaction take place producing a completely different result than one might expect.

Ultimately, making sure we do not leave ourselves open to too much inaccurate interpretation or misinterpretation leads to stronger relations and more positive results, I would dare say.

The reason I see this as important is because all too often we wonder why we are not getting what we want when we ask for something. It may be because we didn’t really ask for the right thing to lead to the desired result. The other side of that coin is how easy it is in today’s over-saturated and over opinionated world of social media to be put in a box because of what we say, don’t say, do or don’t do initiates negative responses from others.

In conclusion, it just might pay handsomely for us to think twice before we ask, say or do anything. Otherwise, we will get exactly the opposite of what we expect or desire. Is getting what you ask for what you want?

It’s a tough row to hoe as they say!

But it is something to keep in the forefront of our minds as we navigate along.

With that in mind, I think we should be careful what we ask for, how we ask for it, what we say and how we phrase it, because you never know what kind of response you will get if you ask or say something inaccurately. No one is perfect!

It’s something to think about as we head on into a new week living life on a positive note.

Cheers!