When You Least Expect It!

When You Least Expect It!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

Today I feel the need to share.

Not long ago I had an incredible set of experiences filled with unexpected beautiful and interesting (if not quirky) tidbits while I was on a two day work related trip. I found myself amazed at how life played itself out, which I realize it always does one way or another.

When our hearts, minds, souls and spirits are open to whatever is offered up to us, one can see more peaceful moments in life for which to embrace and accept as part of who we are. I think as a part of our innate human nature we all have the ability (and power) to constantly move forward even when it seems we are standing in place.

As a precursor to this couple of days, I would like to mention that a couple weeks prior I intentionally took four days off to rejuvenate my spirit after losing a family member and finding myself surrounded by a feeling of sadness, which is only normal. Unfortunately, the trip did not result in rest and relaxation as I found myself responding to daily situations to help or serve others and running here and there all over the place to meet those needs. Even though I got a little beach time in, the trip was not what I wanted or expected it to be. However, it did seem to be what it was supposed to be and I found blessings in those moments, but I understood some of my immediate needs were not met. It wasn’t what I expected or hoped for.

Fast forward to the current trip, I flew into beautiful weather, which produced an instantaneous calmness in me. I got off the plane and boarded a bus and observed the driver happily reading and studying a manuscript written in Arabic, which I found interesting as I do not see this often. I realized I was in a city of diversity which allows anyone from anywhere to be who they are, which does not necessarily reflect on the state of global atrocities.  I felt a sense of peace.

I was whisked away to a friend’s house for a night of sitting on the patio near the ocean and simply enjoying the company and conversation of nothing in particular while having a glass of wine and grilling dinner. 

Afterward, once back at the hotel I realized my phone was missing. I lived without the phone for an entire twelve hours, which I guess for any of us, is a real feat these days. I discovered a blessing in that.

My hotel room had a wonderful view of the bay and the blue sky and fresh air was lovely and soothing. The sunshine and sunsets were captivating.

The next day I had a long 4 hour lunch break and off we went for a drive as would happen the second day as well. I found myself enjoying elements and areas of the city I had not seen before almost like I was on vacation. I was completely peaceful and calm. I felt in my true element, if you will. And, on the first day having this break I was driven back to my friend’s house where I found the missing phone, another little blessing.

The last evening was dinner overlooking the water and good conversation filled laughter and a long walk along the bay.

The final day found me back at the airport on a flight with only 38 people aboard; plenty of legroom and several rows to spread out and chill. The view from the window of the plane was like watching a movie. It moved from one incredible scene to another from a golden hue on the ocean as the sun settled for the day to a puffy bunch of clouds below which looked more like Antarctica terrain than clouds. It was a quick trip home to meet up with out of town guests for a quick dinner before they left, yet another blessing.

Long story short, the rest and relaxation I was looking for on the previous excursion did not present itself until this trip.

Everything I experienced in only a couple of days was completely unexpected and enjoyable even though I was technically on a business outing. I found myself constantly amazed and thankful.

Sometimes the most positive experiences we have are when we least expect them, but the important part of these moments are when we recognize them.

My hope in sharing this story is that each one of us look for the best in every opportunity to see the positive aspects of each moment, because they come when we least expect them and not always as we would plan them.

Have a stupendous week living life on a positive note.

Cheers and Enjoy!

Careful What You Ask For!

Careful What You Ask For!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I responded to a woman’s request today.

She was seated next to me at a coffee shop browsing away on her laptop when she leaned over and asked, “What is the area code here?”  I was entrenched in reading and wasn’t sure I was hearing her correctly, so I responded, “Excuse me?” She then repeated herself and I quickly responded with the answer, “702.”

Following my answer the woman again asked me, “What is the area code here?” I repeated myself to make sure she heard me correctly. In fact, I over enunciated it, “7-0-2!”

Evidently she was not satisfied with my answer and questioned me again, “No, I am asking what the area code is here…for this area.” Peering over my reading glasses, I reiterated my response only to discover this is not what she wanted to know...at all.

Ultimately what she actually wanted to know was what the zip code for the area was. Can you believe that? I had to go through all of this decoding and interpretation to finally figure out what she was asking in order to give her a satisfactory response when all the woman needed to do was ask for what she wanted to know from the very start. I would have helped in any way I could if I had known what she wanted.

If this lady had simply formatted her question correctly the first time, neither of us would have gone through this ordeal. Now, don’t get me wrong. It wasn't a big deal to me, just a befuddling one.

It brings me to the thought on being careful what you pray for, you just might get it, as well as being careful what you ask for lest you receive it.  I gave the woman exactly what she asked for. How could I have possibly known it was not what she wanted?

Sometimes we experience exactly what we ask for even though it is not truly what we want, which goes to show us how important it can be to look before we leap and think before we speak. To achieve positive results, one must think carefully and conscientiously.

In this situation, something as simple as understanding how to ask for the ZIP code versus an AREA code made a conversation (an innocent interaction) go from a positive experience to a potentially negative one.

Do we frustrate and stress ourselves by starting such conversations inaccurately? Do we do the same unto others we are making such inquiries of? If you do not know what you are asking for, how can you attain what you want? Furthermore, if you do not know what you want, how can you achieve the result you aspire to?

I guess in order to turn things around from negative to positive we must consider the situation prior to initiating it.

If you ask for something and you get it only to discover it’s not what you wanted, how will you respond or react? Will you make best use of that information to move forward or use it to start an argument?  Will you realize the error and learn better how to make inquiry the next time or will you make the correction right away and turn things around so the desired result will manifest itself?

While this situation did not begin an argument, it was a bit perplexing. I realize how quickly it could have turned into an explosive situation depending on one’s initial reaction and the brevity of the matter, because I have seen it happen before; all over a misunderstanding brought on by a minor error.

I suppose the reason I decided to bring up the conversation is because I am always interested in producing positivity. Negative situations often fuel further negativity when inappropriately presented or inappropriately handled. We cannot expect the responding party to read our minds and fully understand that when we are asking for something what we really are asking for is something else. If you ask for an area code, you are most likely going to get an area code. But if you really want the zip code, the obvious thing is to ask for the zip code.  Initially it seems simple, but how many times does this kind of interaction take place producing a completely different result than one might expect.

Ultimately, making sure we do not leave ourselves open to too much inaccurate interpretation or misinterpretation leads to stronger relations and more positive results, I would dare say.

The reason I see this as important is because all too often we wonder why we are not getting what we want when we ask for something. It may be because we didn’t really ask for the right thing to lead to the desired result. The other side of that coin is how easy it is in today’s over-saturated and over opinionated world of social media to be put in a box because of what we say, don’t say, do or don’t do initiates negative responses from others.

In conclusion, it just might pay handsomely for us to think twice before we ask, say or do anything. Otherwise, we will get exactly the opposite of what we expect or desire. Is getting what you ask for what you want?

It’s a tough row to hoe as they say!

But it is something to keep in the forefront of our minds as we navigate along.

With that in mind, I think we should be careful what we ask for, how we ask for it, what we say and how we phrase it, because you never know what kind of response you will get if you ask or say something inaccurately. No one is perfect!

It’s something to think about as we head on into a new week living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Happy On Purpose!

Happy On Purpose!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

I saw a graphic displaying a statement reading something to the effect of being happy on purpose or rather, the purpose of life is happiness. What a great thought. The picture showed a person laughing. I loved it. After thinking on it further I made the comment to be happy on purpose because it is the purpose of living and posted it on my twitter feed to share with the universe, if you will.

There are many books and programs available promoting ideas on how to get, pursue and maintain a state of happiness. I have read a few of them and enjoyed them tremendously including Happier Than God, Ten Percent Happier, Happiness NOW! and Stumbling on Happiness. If you are feeding your spirit with good thoughts and ideas of happiness how can you not benefit or reap something by doing so? It’s like osmosis. Something good generates out of such effort. 

There is something else to consider though.

I think you can read as many books as you want, watch many programs or attend a ton of conferences discussing similar topics, but if you are not taking the information to heart and finding a way to utilize it and make it applicable to your life, it means nothing and won’t make any difference to you.

Ergo, the statement to be happy on purpose comes into play. Make it a point to do good things on purpose. Then it becomes a habit. If you want to be happy, then you will be happy.

What does it mean to be happy on purpose? I mean, what does happiness look like when you see it in action?  Is it people laughing, smiling and walking hand in hand with one another? Are there various levels of happy?

I have a friend who I believe resembles this idea quite a bit. I always admire this quality in him. He knows how to go out and purposefully have a good time and find ways to be happy in his own unique way. He works hard. He plays hard. Grant it, his ways of being happy and having fun are not my own, but it works on him. I see this much like the clothing we choose to wear. Clothing styles may look better on some people then they do on others. The way my body is built requires a different take on what I can wear. It’s the same with personality and pursuit of happiness, don’t you think?

For example, some people find their happy in a bar every weekend. They meet a group of friends, go dancing and drinking and it makes them feel good and alive (or at least lively). It’s a let your hair down and cut loose mentality. For them, this is a must at the end of the work week.

What happens when such an environment no longer inspires happy?

My thought?

I will be one of the first to suggest that if something doesn’t contribute to your happiness or if you are unhappy in a situation, then it is up to you to change it in some way.

If one way doesn’t (or no longer) work for you, then find your happy another way.  Recognizing that happiness is something you work on and allow to be; simultaneously. Individual likes and dislikes help guide the inner spirit toward that which determines where your happy lives.  I would also point out changing our environment is not always the solution to how we perceive our happiness playing out. Finding new ways to spark that happy right where you are and simply as you are with might work, too. Running away or escaping one situation as you trade it in for another is not what I mean by being happy on purpose.

I saw a great posting today which fits into this discussion. It said, “The grass is always greener where it is watered.” So to grow, to enhance, to enrich to build upon and nurture one must focus on watering and feeding that which we want to harvest. If that is happiness, then farm it up! This is another way of suggesting be happy on purpose. 

Here’s another thought. Standing in one place is not necessary a solution once you find a happy spot. Life moves. Situations change. A good example of this is watching a new building rise up next door that now will block your million dollar view. We must constantly be aware and reassess where we are in our state of happy; determine what is the root of that happy. It doesn’t mean packing up and moving out. It simply means things may change. In any case, thinking purposefully on sustaining and maintaining our state of happiness may help keep us in a happy place right where we are, which leads to living in a positive state as well. It’s about evaluating your inner well being and speaking to that child within.

Elements of happy may simply come to you quite naturally. I would say those moments are like seeds. Plant those seeds deep in your heart, spirit and soul and care for them.

In so thinking, I hope this week leads you down many paths of happy. If not, utilize the best resources you have available to start your own grass root garden project and cultivate your own happy. Be deliberate. Be happy on purpose!

Why?  Because the purpose of living is to be happy.

Produce your own brand of happy this week and have a great time living life on a positive note.

Cheers!

Put Some Lipstick on That Pig!

Put Some Lipstick on That Pig!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

Okay, here’s a saying that jumped up and slapped me in the face the other day.

“Put some lipstick on that pig!”

If you overheard that proverbial expression or if those words were ever spoken to you, wouldn’t it perk up your ears and peak your curiosity? Wouldn’t you want to know more of where the phrase came from? What does putting lipstick on a pig have to do with anything? Why would anyone want to do that? Pig and lipstick don’t seem to be compatible, so what does it mean?

To me, these are all good questions for the inquisitive mind.

As they say, curious and inquiring minds want to know.

What’s the mystery behind the lipstick-pig conundrum?

I think when most people think of pigs their mind goes straight to bacon or pork chops. For children it might be the story about the three little pigs or singing a song about their ‘piggies’ going to market while counting toes at bedtime.  As for me, I remember chasing greased up piglets at the town fair and one pig butchering, which probably explains why I am a vegetarian!

Now, Wikipedia has this to say about it, "lipstick on a pig" is a rhetorical expression, used to convey the message that making superficial or cosmetic changes is a futile attempt to disguise the true nature of a product."¹

Personally, I think the phrase directs us back to living life on a positive note.

Putting lipstick on a pig is an old phrase used to point us toward looking at life, circumstances, situations, obstacles, hurdles, hurts, pains, uncomfortables, unfortunates and the like from the other side of the fence. It opens our eyes to actually seeing ourselves adding a positive twist and/or altering perspective toward turning things around for the betterment of the whole. At the very least, it indicates things as they really are. 

Putting lipstick on a pig is like seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. What’s great about such a statement is that it provides great imagery to work with; a visual aide, if you will.

I can just see that pig with bright red lipstick smothered all over its snout. I can’t help but smile and chuckle at the thought of it. If anything, it breaks the tension and relieves stress.

Now, as a follow up to hearing this little diddy, I heard a character on a reality television show the other night make the statement, “Lipstick on a pig is still a pig.”

This may true in some instances. You cannot completely cover up reality, but you can make it look better, which is my point. Sometimes a touch up helps everything look and feel better. It takes away some of the sting or stickiness that goes hand in hand with negativity. It’s like spit shining your car or mopping the kitchen floor. It looks good for a little while and there is nothing like the feel of clean floors as you walk barefoot over it. However, it won't stay clean for long. Putting lipstick on a pig is representative of taking a small breather and looking at conditions from a different angle.

I think it’s important to note that spit shining or adding a touch of the figurative lipstick to a pig isn’t an absolute answer to anything, but it serves as a temporary measure to notice it from a different perspective.

Therefore, if you find yourself eye to eye with any negativity this week, keep this phrase in mind. It may inspire some new point of view or remedy. And if anything, it will be a comical image to conjure up as you chug along the path toward keeping life in a positive place.

I don’t think it matters what shade of lipstick you use if you want to paint the pig. Just smear on that waxy goo like you were finger painting a picture for mom! You might feel better in no time. If could take your mind off things for a bit. 

Here’s to the idea of putting lipstick on a pig and using it as a means to living this week on a positive note.

Cheers!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lipstick_on_a_pig (Viewed 8/14/2017)¹

Pray for Vegas, Pray for All!

Pray for Vegas, Pray for All!

By Allen Merritt (©2017)

My phone rang in a text message just before dawn on October 2^nd rousing me from my sleep.

The text read, “Hey, you safe?”

I drowsily wrote back, “Yeah. What’s going on?”

I figured for anyone to be contacting me at an early or late hour asking if everything was okay, that something must have happened I wasn’t aware of. Sure enough, this was the case.While I was sleeping and just three miles from me the deadliest mass murder in U.S. history played itself out. I was just outside what appeared to be a war zone by the sounds of it.

I turned on the news and there it was. The sound of the semi-automatic rifle fire was deafening and frightening. 

A lone wolf went on a killing spree just down the street killing and injuring hundreds of innocents.

It never makes sense to me; this senseless killing, especially when it is methodically and strategically thought out…premeditated.

I listened to the news for hours feeling helpless, but not hopeless.  While I am not in any way a medical professional and hundreds were on duty and in action helping tend to the many victims needs I knew I was better off thinking thoughtfully, prayerfully and positively. Sometimes staying out of the way can be best when there are so many professionals trying to repair the damages, especially when there are people with aggravated chaos to organize and navigate around and through.

It goes without saying I have much respect and admiration for all those first responders and people who were able to be there to help. I am grateful to hear so many immediately sent money, aide, gave blood and more; and  to not waste any time going into recovery mode unlike some of the natural disaster situations which are still trying to gain ground in supplying the needs.

In any case, I was called into help organize and run a prayer vigil service for those who needed to come together for emotional support and lend their prayer support. I was able to give in this manner at least. As I passed by the crime scene area I could clearly see the busted out windows on the 32^nd floor. Both windows stark reminders of how powerful hate can be in propelling such violence. For me, the day was draining and I can only imagine what it was/is like for those suffering injury and loss as a result of this insidious act.

Following the prayer vigil and driving back to my home I noticed many of the electronic billboards had compassionate and encouraging messages supporting everyone’s efforts and needs. I observed social media postings reaching out and reminding everyone to “Pray for Las Vegas. “

We have been through similar experiences before. As a result, people are responding and that support and love cannot be undermined, ignored or denied. Good will trumps evil despite it all. It does not take away the pain but helps comfort, offer solace, and provide a pathway to healing and recovery.  I can only hope important decision makers will open the eyes of their hearts to see better ways to stop such madness (at least reduce it to the lowest common denominator) and they will stop being a part of the problem by going on the attack and instead, begin to shine a healing light toward solutions. I keep seeing important people devalue human life and need. Many argue to protect their investments or image instead of focusing on what is good, best and right for the people they serve.

It makes me wonder if they believe in anything other than themselves. Do they have a faith? Do they understand the gift of life? Do they have to continue destroying humanity? Where do their values and true morals lie? Must they continue down the road of control and manipulation? Do they know how to heal instead of hurt? Do they even get the idea that we are all in this together?  It’s the same boat. Why sink it?

On a positive note, many people are helping, giving of themselves in the best way they can. This is a light shining in the darkness that no one can extinguish. For that, I am thankful and grateful. Let me be one of those to say thank you.

May we continue to be reminded to shine a positive and healing light in the best way we can each and every day as we move forward living life on a positive note.

Pray for Las Vegas, Houston, Florida, Puerto Rico, Mexico and every other place and person in need.

Cheers!