Thinking ‘Bout It!

Thinking ‘Bout It!

©Allen Merritt (2015)

Think.

Thoughts.

Thinking.

This morning two women sat down at the coffee shop and set up their ThinkPads. Both laptops had orange stickers on them which read “Think First!” I found that interesting, because I have been contemplating the idea of thinking and what it means; how it impacts our lives.

I am not sure why, but the other day I remembered a saying I used as a kid which I haven’t used much lately. When people would ask me what I thought or what I was thinking about I’d say, “I don’t think. It’s a nasty habit” or “Thinking is a nasty habit. I try never to do it.” This was my feeble attempt at humor. In truth, I thought a lot; maybe too much.

My mother used to ask me all the time what I was thinking about and I would simply say, “Nothing.” Her response was, “That’s impossible.” No one can sit there and literally not think about something. The mind doesn’t work that way. However, I beg to differ. Sometimes, the mind is spaced out and drifts off without focus of thought. It simply ‘is’. I suppose the mind is always working on a subconscious level, but as far as the right here and right now, can we always say we are constantly thinking or should be constantly thinking?

As I write, my mind ticks off a list of references:

• I think, therefore I am.
• Think about it.
• Thinking out loud.
• Thinking of you.

Aretha Franklin sings, “You better think, think about what you’re trying to do to me. Yeah, Think!”

George Wallace has a popular statement. He says, “I be thinking.”

All of the above are good ideas and interesting to ponder considering the world we live in today. It seems people do not view the idea of thought and thought processes quite the same as in the past. I observe how people do not think for themselves anymore. Instead of being responsive, individuals are primarily reactive. It’s like we’re living in a constant fight or flight time period, an either put up or shut up mentality. Of course, it is never safe to blanket society with a comment, but it does appear a common trend…not to think or consider anything or anyone.

To me, the idea of ‘thinking’ is utilizing one’s own mind to make determinations, assess and find solutions, initiate creativity, process the world around us, attempt to understand and pave a pathway through life of nonstop decision making. Thinking becomes a navigation tool for which human beings live by or so we think. Common sense and thinking often have nothing to do one with the other. Reports illustrate the dummying down effect upon our society.

What does any of this have to do with keeping life on a positive upswing? It occurs to me that having a thought connects us to something. Exploring that thought further brings us to a new place to either consider it or discount it, which will ultimately lead us to yet another place where we store an opinion about a person, place or thing. Without thinking about it we would never get involved in any activity, relationship or job. Improving on a situation, finding solutions, self-preservation techniques and any and/or all progress would come to a complete and udder halt without some form of thought processing. Mankind has thought long and hard in years gone by and we reap the rewards of their efforts today. To me, that brings us to a positive place. The desire to leave the world in a better place is initiated by these efforts as well as our ability to continue it in the same vein.

Years ago, I wrote a poetic performance piece called Death by Thought Process. In considering the importance of thinking positively and pushing toward the positive, I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that 'over-thinking' can put us in a negative place. Over-assessing and over-evaluating life leads to fretting, frustration and uncertainty. Death by Thought Process spoke to the idea of going too far, letting other people get inside our head and pushing us over the edge toward negative consequences.

In conclusion, thinking is good. Sometimes letting our thoughts flow freely or giving our brain a rest is productive, as well. Take a break once in a while. Know the difference in how thought processing effectively works toward the betterment of the whole. Think…yes! Never think….no. Respond…yes. Over think…no!

Remember, we have choices when, where, how and what we think.

Two final thoughts:

• Think for yourself
• Think before you speak.

If we let it, both of these will lean us toward something positive.

So have some good thoughts this week. Let them be positive and productive.

Enjoy.

Cheers!

Stop, Alter and Go! - OPN Exercise #4

Stop, Alter and Go! - OPN Exercise #4

©Allen Merritt (2015)

This week’s positivity exercise is the final in a series of exercises focused on finding the good in our lives. Let’s call it the ‘Stop, Alter and Go!’ movement.

‘Stop, Alter and Go!’ is kind of a spin off from the old Stop, Drop and Roll campaign which taught children what to do in a fire situation. In this case, we are not dealing with a fire hazard, but we are looking for ways to discover how to change attitudes and mindsets.

In order to follow through with this exercise, we need to be aware and ready to stop for a minute to consider all possibilities. Replace words and actions with positive ones. Consider this a re-training exercise. Retrain yourself to think and behave differently. You are the facilitator.

Here’s the plan of action:

STOP refers to the idea that you are ever-mindful and aware; prepared to pause, consider and be responsive to a situation. Don’t react, jump the conclusions or make fast decisions based on what appears to be happening. Stopping is an opportunity to see the overall objective picture before taking a step forward.

ALTER means taking all sides of a situation into account and deciding how to change, remove and replace an action, a thought, a word or comment to make better and improve the moment. For example, the next time you want to blurt out a curse word in a professional or public setting (which could prove embarrassing) replace the word with something more appropriate and/or humorous such as the following phrases:

Shitake mushrooms!

Fudge apples!

Oh, Bollocks!

Dagnabit!

Dadgummit!

Other thoughts are to think about smiling instead of frowning or gesturing a peace sign instead of the flipping the bird (middle finger); or, when you are about to think the worst start thinking about the best possible outcome. Next time a driver cuts in front of you and/or changes lanes without so much as a turn signal warning try thinking about how lucky you are to be alert enough to avoid a possible accident. When negotiating through a poor customer service experience consider how to get the other party on your side by letting them know you are on their side by using phrases such as, “I know you’re busy. I appreciate your help.” Or “Thank you for all that you’re doing.”

GO is what happens once you have made the conscious decision to change the situation as in the examples mentioned above. Initiate and implement the good vibe.

Of course, there are hundreds of ways to do this and more examples then the few already mentioned. Each circumstance is different and provides a chance to turn it around into a more comfortable situation. I think this is better than starting a confrontation episode or wallowing in misery.

Be prepared for other individuals not to respond in the same manner, but embrace your ability to do your best and be the best you can possibly be in any given moment. Then move on and let go as needed.

You can really re-frame your mindset and starting altering your point of view without much pause once you get into the habit of doing it. Simply stop and consider. Then alter it and move forward. 

STOP,

ALTER,

GO!

Try it out. Have a great week.

Cheers!

I Spy – OPN Exercise #3

I Spy – OPN Exercise #3

©Allen Merritt (2015)

Games.

Most games are usually meant to be a source of fun, education or positive mental activity.

Of course, I am not referring to head games or games people play to manipulate, control or connive their way to the top. This type of game playing generally is unproductive and useless for everyone in the long run.

However, most people like to play the games that generate fun and good times for everyone. Remember taking road trips and looking for things to do in the car? It was a chance to read, sleep, be social and have family time and look for ways to occupy ourselves until reaching our destination. There are games of counting telephone poles, seeing how many out of state license plates you can spot, how many cars only have one headlight working (we called this a padiddle), spotting various types of animals or the game “I Spy with my little eye something…(fill in the blank).”

This week’s OPN exercise is about spotting the good as you are out and about and moving through your day. Sometimes we have to make a deliberate effort to find the good that surrounds us. So, I suggest taking time this week to consciously look for the good out in the community. I spy…what? See how many things spark your interest or grab your attention that would fit in the “good” category.  Take a moment to put down the cell phone, tablet or other electronic device and unbury your nose long enough to take a look at what’s around you. And, don’t focus in on the negative. That’s too easy.

Not everything has to be an elaborate version of what is good. Keep it simple. The simple and little things matter in helping to turn around our moments and help make the day move along smoothly. For example, as I write this in a coffee shop, I noticed a young man walk in wearing a really simple short sleeved shirt covered in paisleys. Now, I love paisleys, so this was a good thing for me and I enjoyed the sight.  It was also something I liked, which was a part of the OPN Exercise from a couple weeks back.

That is all there is to it! Look and find something good as you travel around this week.

You might not be deliberately searching for what you like or how to re-envision a situation in this exercise, but it may include aspects of them. The goal is to just move about your day and see all the good things going on out there in the world. Hone in on them and you will keep life hopping along on a positive note. We need every little thing we can to inspire us and improve our moments. After all, this is the life we are living. We need to always remind ourselves of the good and not wallow in the negative, the bad or the past. Don’t live in a place where things take you away from who you are, want to be and/or should be.

Enjoy the exercise. I look forward to next week and all it has to offer in the way of positivity.

Until then, have a good one.

Cheers!

Find the Good – OPN Exercise #2

Find the Good – OPN Exercise #2

©Allen Merritt (2015)

I think most people know what it’s like to search for Easter eggs or go on a scavenger hunt. We are looking for something specific and attempting to gather it up and store it in our collection baskets or bags. It’s kind of like squirrels gathering nuts for the winter or collecting candy goods every Halloween by darning a scary costume and going door-to-door trick or treating. Afterwards, we have a supply of something we like or something good that we can enjoy now, as well as later.

This week’s OPN exercise highlights the idea of finding the good in something even when the initial impression or experience is mostly negative. If you could re-envision the experience, what could you or would you see or do to make it different and improved?

I remember being told that if I did not have anything good to say then don’t say anything at all. Then there was the Golden Rule of doing unto others as you would have them do unto you. I believe the ideas illustrated by these sayings had more to do with teaching us how to create positive environments than it did in teaching us manners.

In a day and age when so many air their dirty laundry on social media and feel obliged to rant and rave their personal thoughts and opinions (without a filter) to the point of anger, it’s difficult to see anything good. In any case, it is an idea to work on.

Here is an example of finding good in something which I’ve used a lot. Many times I have auditioned for job opportunities. Afterwards, I never learn the outcome or results. Most of the time I don’t know how I did. Was I right for the job? Did I do well at representing myself? Did I have a chance? Or, did I get the job? Generally, I have to go into the audition, give it a go and leave with the idea of forgetting I had ever gone. This is a difficult task to achieve when you are constantly hunting for work opportunities. One way I try to find good in those moments is to treat them as a free opportunity such as an acting, dance or improvisation class. Free instruction! No charge, yet, an option to practice my craft in front of an audience and be seen by industry professionals despite the outcome. This is my way of looking for something good. The same thing can be accomplished in any situation that isn’t going well.

Other ideas to consider:

• Ask yourself, "What good can come of this" instead of thinking how no good can come from it
• Think more about the possible positive outcomes
• Consider it a networking opportunity
• Think of this moment as a stepping stone to a better one
• Remember how this moment is only temporary

I'm sure there are a ton of ideas that many out there use on a daily basis to find good in the middle of chaos.

For this week’s exercise, take some time to re-envision any difficult moments you come across during the week. Brainstorm through ideas on how to improve a situation and make it better. Actually, imagine it happening. Think on how to make an experience feel better. I think this exercise initiates the possibilities, as well as the positive. If we try hard enough we can always find something good in every situation. We can then use that ‘good’ to help pull us through. We can always make the best of a bad situation when we locate that which captivates us and capitulates the positive vibes!

One of my favorite old times songs illustrating the idea of finding the good in ones situation is called Making the Best of a Bad Situation. Here’s a taste of that song to enjoy as you contemplate this week’s OPN exercise.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F0kiqmpA0ew

Go out there and find something positive!

Cheers!